One of my favourite theorists about the human condition is a man called Abraham Maslow, who many consider the father of the human potential movement in the west. In 1957 he wrote a book called "Personality and Motivation", in which he introduced his famous 'hierarchy of needs'. This theory expounds the idea that all human being have six basic needs which are organised in an innate order of importance.
They start with our need for safety and survival, then love and connection, freedom and autonomy, community and contribution, significance and recognition and finally self actualisation. I tend to believe that there is a seventh discreet need for transcendence which he tended to lump in with self actualisation. He speculates that all human behaviours are strategies to meet these needs. This philosophy led to the emergence of Maslow's grumble theory which says that we are continually engaged in a natural process of growth. As we succeed in meeting one of our needs our satisfaction is very short lived, soon to be replaced by the dissatisfaction of not having met the next one up the ladder. Through this mechanism we remain motivated to continue learning and becoming, to be all that we are capable of.
I don't know about you, but it seems pretty accurate to me. I think that I'm like everybody else in that I can work my tush off to achieve that latest goal, buy the latest toy, woo the latest romantic partner and so on, only to discover that my joy in succeeding is very short lived and quickly gives rise to a new goal. The thing that I firmly believed would make me happy almost instantly becomes meaningless. I climb to the top of one mountain to discover that the view is of another mountain, even higher and more challenging, which quickly demands my attention.
In many eastern philosophies they deal with this by advocating a path of renunciation. If the things of this world can only bring such fleeting happiness, then bother no more with this paradigm of becoming, and turn your attention only to the world of being. It seems logical, but it has never sat well with me. I believe that there is a middle path, a paradigm of both becoming and being. Perhaps even, becoming through being.
So what does that mean? Well' it starts for me with acceptance of the value of becoming. I am a human, and I will always be driven to learn, expand, achieve and experience the vast variety of treasures this world has to offer. There is great joy in this, great challenge and excitement, and it only becomes a problem for me when I attach to it the expectation that it will make me happy. In fact, it seems the only thing that achieving my goals will really do is lead me to greater dissatisfaction, to the need to tackle higher mountains. There is no end, no point in the journey at which I may declare myself finished and bask in the glory of my achievement.
So if the achievements and delights of this world will never make me happy, and expecting them to leaves me feeling miserable and disappointed, what am I to do? Perhaps the answer lies not in the destination, but in the enjoyment of the journey. I like to think of as the approach of a master craftsman. Imagine being a master furniture maker, knowing that in the moment that you complete your current work it will be sold to another, never to be seen again. It will travel to anther's home where it may be cherished, or it could be trashed and abused. Eventually, no matter how perfectly it is made, time will take it's toll and your fine creation will deteriorate and crumble.
What then is the point of your work? why give it so mush effort and love, when it's going to end up in exactly the same state as the trash you buy from IKEA? If you ask such a person I believe that they will tell you it is not the result, which provides but a fleeting pleasure, but the process which makes it all worth while. It is the act of giving yourself completely to your creation, of loving and caring, of surrender to the inspiration inside, that really brings happiness. It is not what you are doing, but how you are doing it, how you are being in your doing.
Or so it is for me. When I drop the expectation that happiness will come from the result, and allow myself to be fully immersed in the action and the moment at hand, I discover that I AM happy. When I remember to give all my love, all my attention, all my integrity to what I am doing, it ceases to matter what the future holds. From this place I am still engaged in the action of becoming, but I am am doing it from a place of being, from grace. From here, becoming becomes easy, a joyful adventure in the now, rather than a desperate struggle for a happiness at some point in the future. That way the next mountain does not lessen the joy of this one, but shows up as a new opportunity for doing what I love - living.
Martin Luther King Junior said "whatsoever you do, whatever your job, do it to the best of your ability". I think he knew the secret of being.
Peace & blessings
Adam Blanch
Monday, June 23, 2008
Saturday, June 21, 2008
In the beginning
So, blog No 1. the big numero uno, the first word.
This is a blog about my ongoing quest to live my live from a place of Passion & Grace. Which leads to the obvious question - what exactly is grace (passion being fairy self explanatory)? Don't get me wrong, I'm not on some sort of religious trip with this. Grace, for me, is a very direct and real experience - that moment when I find myself inexplicably at peace, unfettered by fears, worries and striving. I think everyone has had this experience at some point in their life, I just became fascinated by it, mainly because it feels so darn good.
I'm not sure when I first became consiously aware of it, but one of the earliest 'standout' experiences for me was in my early twenty's. I was involved in a failing business, which had beggared me to the point where I really didn't know where the next meal was coming from. I remember walking up the street in Crowsnest, Sydney, in a state of complete panic and stress. My head was swimming with a fog of fear and dark imaginings and I felt utterly sick to my stomach. At some point, a small black and white cat came out of it's yard and started walking beside me. Normally I would stop to give the little fella a pat, but I was so involved in my self pity that I chose to ignore him. Nevertheless he kept following me, in fact he crossed two busy city roads to keep up. Eventually I sucumbed to the pressure and stopped to give him some attention. After only a short while he got up, turned around and started back towards his house. As I watched him deftly weaving between speeding cars I remember thinking what a strange thing it was for a cat to do.
Half a block later I suddenly realised that I was no longer suffering from fear and worry, in fact I was joyfully humming a tune and enjoying the sunshine. Nothing about my situation had changed, I still didn't have a clue what to do about eating that night, but it no longer seemed to be a problem. I realised that something had moved that cat to be my saving Angel, something I didn't understand that was obviously beyond my everyday experience of life.
That something is what I call Grace, and the older I get the more I realise that it underpinss my entire existence. Each and every day of my life is filled with it, and the more I become aware of it the more joyful, passionate and 'graceful' my life becomes. I've learnt to understand over the ensuing years that grace is not some random, or even unusual occurrence. It is a deep well of power, the vital force in my life that is attempting to move me to happiness and fulfillment, if only I can get out my own way. It asks nothing of me beyond my trust, makes no demands, renders no judgements and requires no payment. And all I have to do to enjoy its gifts is to recognise it, to see life through eyes of gratitude, appreciation and curiosity.
So, is my life a perfect unfolding of joy? Not at all, I face the same challenges and trials as everyone else does. However, when I 'remember to remember grace', I find that I face those challenges from a very different and more empowered place. It strikes me that Grace is the opposite of Stress. Stress arises for me when I'm believing that somehow I do not have the power to meet those challenges, that I'm outmatched by life. Grace is the recognition that my life is driven by a power far deeper than my conscious mind and more vast than I can imagine. The same power that makes my body breathe in and out, that makes rivers run, birds fly and stars turn in the heavens in feats of impossibly complex perfection.
I do have to give some thing up to find grace in my life though. Things like arrogance, control, aggression, defensiveness and fairytale fantasies of perfect futures planned by yours truly. this was brought home to me on my 30th birthday, when I sat down and reviewed the last twelve years of my life as a self responsible adult. It became clear to me that absolutely none of the plans I had made for my life had come to fruition. This disturbed me for a minute, until I realised that my life had been far richer and more interesting than any of my plans would have been, and that I was a better person for it. I decided then and there to treat my dreams and plans with a degree of skepticism, and stay open to the possibility that my life was a greater adventure than I knew.
So, a little introduction to the grace that I find in my life. In writing this Blog I hope to achieve two things. Firstly, to keep myself in the practice of surrendering to grace and secondly, to share with whomever is interested the little moments of insight and joy that enrich my life (and hopefully yours) when I live my life from passion and grace.
Blessings
Adam Blanch
This is a blog about my ongoing quest to live my live from a place of Passion & Grace. Which leads to the obvious question - what exactly is grace (passion being fairy self explanatory)? Don't get me wrong, I'm not on some sort of religious trip with this. Grace, for me, is a very direct and real experience - that moment when I find myself inexplicably at peace, unfettered by fears, worries and striving. I think everyone has had this experience at some point in their life, I just became fascinated by it, mainly because it feels so darn good.
I'm not sure when I first became consiously aware of it, but one of the earliest 'standout' experiences for me was in my early twenty's. I was involved in a failing business, which had beggared me to the point where I really didn't know where the next meal was coming from. I remember walking up the street in Crowsnest, Sydney, in a state of complete panic and stress. My head was swimming with a fog of fear and dark imaginings and I felt utterly sick to my stomach. At some point, a small black and white cat came out of it's yard and started walking beside me. Normally I would stop to give the little fella a pat, but I was so involved in my self pity that I chose to ignore him. Nevertheless he kept following me, in fact he crossed two busy city roads to keep up. Eventually I sucumbed to the pressure and stopped to give him some attention. After only a short while he got up, turned around and started back towards his house. As I watched him deftly weaving between speeding cars I remember thinking what a strange thing it was for a cat to do.
Half a block later I suddenly realised that I was no longer suffering from fear and worry, in fact I was joyfully humming a tune and enjoying the sunshine. Nothing about my situation had changed, I still didn't have a clue what to do about eating that night, but it no longer seemed to be a problem. I realised that something had moved that cat to be my saving Angel, something I didn't understand that was obviously beyond my everyday experience of life.
That something is what I call Grace, and the older I get the more I realise that it underpinss my entire existence. Each and every day of my life is filled with it, and the more I become aware of it the more joyful, passionate and 'graceful' my life becomes. I've learnt to understand over the ensuing years that grace is not some random, or even unusual occurrence. It is a deep well of power, the vital force in my life that is attempting to move me to happiness and fulfillment, if only I can get out my own way. It asks nothing of me beyond my trust, makes no demands, renders no judgements and requires no payment. And all I have to do to enjoy its gifts is to recognise it, to see life through eyes of gratitude, appreciation and curiosity.
So, is my life a perfect unfolding of joy? Not at all, I face the same challenges and trials as everyone else does. However, when I 'remember to remember grace', I find that I face those challenges from a very different and more empowered place. It strikes me that Grace is the opposite of Stress. Stress arises for me when I'm believing that somehow I do not have the power to meet those challenges, that I'm outmatched by life. Grace is the recognition that my life is driven by a power far deeper than my conscious mind and more vast than I can imagine. The same power that makes my body breathe in and out, that makes rivers run, birds fly and stars turn in the heavens in feats of impossibly complex perfection.
I do have to give some thing up to find grace in my life though. Things like arrogance, control, aggression, defensiveness and fairytale fantasies of perfect futures planned by yours truly. this was brought home to me on my 30th birthday, when I sat down and reviewed the last twelve years of my life as a self responsible adult. It became clear to me that absolutely none of the plans I had made for my life had come to fruition. This disturbed me for a minute, until I realised that my life had been far richer and more interesting than any of my plans would have been, and that I was a better person for it. I decided then and there to treat my dreams and plans with a degree of skepticism, and stay open to the possibility that my life was a greater adventure than I knew.
So, a little introduction to the grace that I find in my life. In writing this Blog I hope to achieve two things. Firstly, to keep myself in the practice of surrendering to grace and secondly, to share with whomever is interested the little moments of insight and joy that enrich my life (and hopefully yours) when I live my life from passion and grace.
Blessings
Adam Blanch
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